To Be A Tree

Driving to work this morning, I was, as usual, very appreciative of the lush,green trees that adorn the earth this time of year.  The very beginning of summer brings a sense of renewal to me.  A chance to unwind from the busy school year of lesson plans, endless hours of grading writing papers, and bells signaling every aspect of my life from how much longer I have to talk, go to the bathroom, eat lunch, etc.  I started to think about the trees, and how I pray over the summer, I can find a way to reach a few more students next year, as well as other individuals this summer I encounter throughout my day to be more like a tree.

What?  A tree?  Hear me out.  Juniors in high school with all of life's answers and others too...just ask them...if they look up from their phones long enough, which is doubtful,  may tell you how much they know about life, not trees but life. Well, after fifty one years, twenty five of them teaching,  I too know a thing or two about life and perhaps why each of us should aspire to be more like a tree.

A tree, regardless of what species, will strive to reach its fullest potential.  A tree doesn't stop one day and say, "Yep.  I'm good.  I'm done growing. I just can't do it."  It strives to be as tall as it possibly can, regardless of its circumstances.  Not all days are sunny and perfect for growing conditions, yet each day, it reaches toward the heavens.  It doesn't settle and make excuses as to why it can't grow.  It simply does a little bit each and every day, trusting that some day, it will be as it was created to be.  Not necessarily limitless, but not allowing limits..or excuses.. to keep it from achieving its goal. 

A tree is aware that not all things in life are kind, for example, storms and strong winds.  Guarding against things that will harm by planting its roots strongly in the ground, or in a human's case, like a belief, to protect against harsh elements and destructive forces. A tree will reach deep into the earth to steady itself. If a person has a belief system, it will enable a moral compass to point a person in the right direction.  There are many distractions and individuals that seek to harm others but if the evils in life recognize one can't be swayed, they will move on.   

It can let go of the old.  Not all trees lose their leaves but those that do, know the old must be discarded and tossed to the wind, so new life can emerge.  Letting go of old hurts, grudges, and even failures allows new growth to take place.  A person may even need to rake up the old, burn it, and let it go. A person, much like the tree, has the power to let go of the past and begin again. 

Never does a tree judge.  It will grow next to other trees of various species and do quite well.  It isn't worried what kind or color of leaves the other trees have compared to it, or if the trees around it seem to have a more lush canopy or larger branches.  It simply revels in its own beauty and purpose, allowing the other trees to do the same.  Many should take note and appreciate the differences of others, not judge.  Each tree has the right to be part of the forest.  How boring it would be if every tree was the same...

A tree will ask for no praise, yet still flourish.  A tree doesn't have to constantly ask the others in the forest how it's growing, or if it's leaves are the right shape or color.  It doesn't greet the sun in the morning and tell it, "Look, if you, Sun, aren't going to shine on me with your brightest rays, then I'm not going to grow or do anything I'm supposed to do.  You owe me, Sun.  I'm entitled to your rays."  If that was the case, the sun could focus its strongest rays on the tree and burn the damn thing to the ground, which if you have ever taught or have encountered individuals like this, then you too, wish there were days you had the power of the sun's rays...)

And last.  A tree can provide cover and comfort for others.  On the hottest of days, it can provide shade for the animals and humans as well.  It extends its branches to help others in time of need when the rain comes pouring down and can provide shelter.  It takes in animals...and people too, allowing them to have a place to rest.  Many have leaned tired against a tree and felt its support.  It helps others and never once, not a single time, asks for anything in return.  Imagine, if each person could do a kind act without asking for anything in return, how amazing the world would be.

There you have it, Buckers.  That is why I feel we should all aspire to be more like a tree and be a more positive addition to the forest known as the human race.

*On a side note, a gorgous soul I know creates the most beautiful trees out of recycled guitar strings. She weaves  these pieces of magic herself. She created this jewel for me.  Visit  http://twiceuponastring.com/

Light and being a MiMi

Recently, I was looking out across the lake and noticed the light dancing on the water.  Millions of little ripples capturing the sunshine.  I thought of light.  It's reflection and how it is captured by so many things in nature.  In people too.  Once in a while you are fortunate enough to meet one of those individuals that seems to hold the magic of this light within them and allows it to dance from his or her eyes into yours for brief pleasurable moments.  Creating within the onlooker a sense of peace and pure joy.

"There's nothing like it,"  and "they will melt your heart" were a couple of the many phrases expressed with a genuine emotion from both men and women alike when describing having a grandchild.  "Um, sure," I would think and walk away with about as much belief as I have in getting an Ironman spot to Kona.  (For those with a positive attitude thinking.. “You just need to train!”are obviously unaware that I am quite sure I can't do an 11:30 IM qualifying time. 😅 ) Nevertheless, I would walk away wondering if such an emotion would be found from knowing this little human I would meet that my daughter would bring into the world.

Don't get me wrong, I was very excited she was on the way.  (Nowadays, one can practically send texts back and forth with the unborn child with the technology available, so it was definite it was a she.)  Yes, I was excited, but the type of excited these individuals that seemed to have and be members of a secret club of highly emotional, energized grandparents was evading me.  Months passed, sonogram pics were viewed, and the excitement grew but that big rush of emotion still wasn't present.  A few times, I was running or cycling and thought.. “Ok, now...maybe this rush will arrive.” Nope.  Either it was too soon, or I was just a complete heart of stone.  An outcast in the grandparent..or MiMi, as I would be called, world.  My sister even gave me a Mimi Life coffee cup that I filled with aromatic coffee and delightful creamers...still...no great rush of emotion, just the excitement of the arrival.

Well, as guessed, because obviously they can't bake in the oven forever, the day of her arrival, September 29, 2017, was at hand.  I was even very blessed to witness the birth!  In fact, hold a leg while witnessing...um..well, it's quite a graphic ordeal...the birth. I didn't pass out and felt incredibly blessed to be part of such an amazing experience to share with my daughter and her man.

I saw the baby and admit, I felt a twinge if this emotional grandparent love but it took a bit longer for me.  I swore, I would never be one of those grandparents that constantly showed pics, videos, etc.  Um...now?..I'm like Rainman.  Bugging my daughter for pics for my daily screensaver at work, annoying her with constant phone calls...not just calls...video chat ones...because nothing spells crazy like standing in the middle of the produce aisle talking into a small square device to a baby on a screen in a voice higher pitched than necessary with emphatic devotions of love full of the secret society emotion I was now a part of in life. 
Yes.  It arrived...and then some.  That light?  I see it in Anniston’s eyes and hear it in my daughter's voice when she speaks to her.  Anniston responds with pure love, emotion, devotion, and trust. I see it in Anniston's father, Michael, when he talks to both Jensin and Anniston. I do know this sense of pure joy and love that was spoken of prior to her arrival.  The rush of emotion encompassing your entire being when I look at her.  Proudly, I show my pics and videos.  After all, Buckers, I'm a MiMi now.  What more did you expect? Me?  I got much more.  Much, much more.

The Bonk, and the Bike

       It has been over five months since I've touched the keys to write.  Why?  Well, a lot has occurred.  Growth aka divorce, and the death of a very special friend, Gracie...yes, my mini Yorkie.  I'll talk about growth but Gracie just isn't a subject I'm ready to discuss, possibly never.  That may seem silly to many but for some, understood.   I will tell you she was very sick with Blastomycosis, and for the sake of her not suffering, I had to make a very difficult decision.  That is all I can really say about it.

      I started this blog discussing trying to qualify for Boston.  Well, it went about as well as can be expected...much like the marriage....it started out very strong and promising.  I was clicking the miles off on pace for Boston.  After twenty miles, I thought to myself, "Damn!  I really may get this!  I only have a 10K left!" Then, much like my marriage, shit just started to go south.  Not like sweet tea south or good BBQ south, but hot, humid, sticky August pissed off south. My body refused to listen...I kept thinking, "Run!" but my body answered in a slow drawl, "Naw, not today. Today, I'm going to feel tired after twenty miles and want to sit down and take a nap."  Like, literally sit down on the side of the road and catch a snooze. What was happening??!!

     I was bonking.
 
     My body had hired it's own lawyer and was divorcing me from the chance of making it to Boston. I was completely bucked at that point because once you start to bonk, it's only a matter of time before your body says, enough. Just reaching the finish line, much less trying to maintain a pace to qualify for Boston, becomes the new goal.  Pride put aside, I did finish the marathon.  Did I cry?  Of course. Especially, when I watched the pacer with the bright yellow Boston knee socks jog out of sight and disappear completely.  It was painful. I had to walk a few times at the end and the tears of defeat fell.  All those early morning miles, tired legs, endless hours of sweating, gone in an added thirteen minutes tagged on to the 4 hour required time for a fifty year old female to run Boston.

     I didn't run for weeks after the marathon.  I couldn't. I didn't want to. In fact, I bucking hated to run even a mile after bonking like that.  What happened to ignite my training?  The bike. It actually came as a blessing because I realized a few things while riding my bike again...there are things about riding, that are very similar to life.

1. Learn to use your gears: You've got to use your gears on the bike. All of them. The routes you ride, much like life are not all flat and fast, so you've got to learn to make changes that will enhance your ride, much like your life. It's foolish to ride for miles stuck in the same gear, knowing you've got an arsenal of them. Shifting gears is good, so are changes in life.

2. Draft when needed: Drafting can save up to 30% of energy expenditure on a ride. It's OK to accept when you need someone to help pull you a little, so you can get your strength back. Recognize you can't suck their wheel forever, but do realize when you may need a little help when it's windy. Get rested, then pull for them. (Sorry, triathletes...in a race you're on your own, but you may draft once in a while on a training ride. 😁)

3. Embrace the climb: Not one of my favorites but I've learned the hard way to embrace it because   I keep in mind the grind to the top of the hill or mountainside is worth the view from the top. Is it easy? Hell no. There will be times you'll have to stop and have a "moment" then get your butt back on the bike and continue to grind. Put your head down and finish it out. It's tough but if you are lucky, you'll have someone that will ride quietly by your side supporting you. 💕

4. Enjoy the descents: When you reach the top of a tough one, smile on the descent. Allow yourself to enjoy what you've accomplished and laugh out loud on the way down the hill or mountainside. You've earned it.

5. Avoid potholes, rocks, and vehicles: Pay attention when you ride. You can look ahead and see potholes, obstacles, and vehicles. You can't assume someone will mark the dips and rocks. You for damn sure can't assume a vehicle will watch for you. You are your own responsibility and can make decisions to avoid such negative and sometimes deadly things. Again, pay attention and avoid the drama and negatives. Yes, you DO have that choice.

Well, there you have it, Buckers.  A few life lessons I've learned and been reminded of while riding my bike.  I'm even back to swimming and running to train for my 7th Ironman in Chattanooga on September 24, 2017.  Join me on the journey.  Peace. ✌

It's All About Balance

    For the most part, I eat clean.  It's that "for the most part" that keeps me from those few pounds that actually may make a bit of a difference over the 26 miles..wait..26.2...you can't forget that .2 of the marathon.  If I was math savvy, I could give an example of the difference of carrying 137 pounds for 26.2 versus 133-135.  (Although, when the woman at the drivers license counter just this week asked,"Is everything correct from your last license?" Me:"Yes." Her: "Still an organ donor?" Me:

"Yes." Her: "Still 120 on the weight?" Me: without hesitation "Yep"  She looked at me and smiled. She knew damn well I was telling a lie but women have an understanding that whatever weight is on the license at sixteen, remains.)  So! According to my license, I'm good to go!  ;-)

     The thing is, if I try "dieting" I do awful, and let's be honest...athletes need food.  I even got The 21 Day Fix...which lasted about one day..and didn't fix me because I'm quite certain they sent me the version that was used for a smaller scale display or something.  I kid you not, a golf ball filled the carb container.  Definitely not my style.   

     It really is true, if you want to perform well, it does matter what fuel you are putting into your body. Not eating enough while training for a marathon (or any training) can be disastrous on longer runs as well as recovery. However, just as disastrous is having the mindset that if you run 18 miles, you can eat the whole pizza and dessert.  You tell yourself, "Oh, this won't matter.  I've got a huge run this weekend."  That's not quite how you should be thinking.  It's about balance.  Just because you are doing extreme training, doesn't mean you can be doing extreme eating.  

      You have to find what fuels your body and not go by the latest trend, or even worse, try something new the week of the race.  I try to eat the same things prior to long runs, so I can see if what I'm eating is really working.  I'm into the longer runs, like 18 and 19 miles now, so I eat the same things I'll be eating race week.   Prior to the run, it's oatmeal with a scoop of protein and a piece of toast with half an avocado sprinkled with red pepper.  During the run my necessities are a gel every 5-6 miles and BASE (it's an electrolyte salt) every mile if it's very hot, or every couple if it's average temp.  One hip bottle has Gatorade and the other hip bottle has a water.  I'm currently practicing getting the gel down without slowing down...or not dropping my water or Gatorade bottle while unclasping it from the belt.  I haven't decided if I'll carry my own for the marathon or use what they offer on the tables....just as long as it doesn't slow me down.   Oh! I forgot the morning coffee. That's a must.  Yes, I roast my own beans that I order and grind it fresh every morning..it's like crack.  I've never tried crack but I'm sure it's probably close. :-)  

     So, there you have it, Buckers.  Some random thoughts about balance and being prepared for what you will use on race day.  If you want a treat, then have it...just not every day..or every other day...once a week is probably good.  I'll either be completing a long run this weekend or in line at the Dairy Queen. Balance, Buckers.  

     

The Garmin Faceplant

On January 28th, my life as I knew it came to a screeching halt.  No, there wasn't a tragedy or death...though the next seven days of my life I'm pretty sure I thought I saw the Grim Reaper.  I had influenza, and my Garmin activity took a turn for the worst.  In fact, it looks like I completely face planted and didn't move for seven straight days.  I had an amazing training run that included speed work on Thursday the 26th, then Friday came and it began....the aches, fever, chills, headache, kill me now symptoms.  Three days into the sickness, I started to make deals in my head.  A prayer if you will, to the Great Wellness in the Sky.  It went something like this..."I just want to feel better so I can run, hell, okay just to even walk, okay, even get out of this recliner..I'll, um, well, I'll never say f*%$ anymore. (a very long pause) Or at least not as much.  Like only when things are bad. Like now, they are really f&(*&& bad.  If I could just suddenly get better, that would be so f*(&^^ awesome.  Amen."

  

OK, so I need to work on my prayer skills a little. I'm pretty sure I was heard but didn't seem sincere, so the sickness continued.  That's the thing with prayer, you have to be sincere.  I thought about that for a while, then the marathon in April came into mind.  I have to be sincere in my training if I truly want to qualify for Boston.  I do, and I am sincere. I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing.  The speed work, the mid runs, the long runs, and most import, the rest.  Often ten miles are completed before school in the morning, so I don't miss out on family time.  Believe me, getting up at 3:52 (I have a thing about the number 7) in the morning to run ten plus miles is being sincere.  I couldn't be any more bucking sincere if I tried.  But will it be enough?  It will help for sure.  However, after completing six Ironman Triathlons (no, not bragging), I can honestly tell you, it comes down to the sincere belief in oneself, that crosses that finish line and reaches a set goal.  The miles can be stored and the speed work completed, but if my mind isn't set for the pace, it won't happen.  Does it hurt?  Yes.  Am I obsessed?  You have to be.  Do I picture the finish line?  Every day. 

Do you have a goal?  If not, get one.  Life is short, Buckers.  Your health is precious, so set a fitness goal and go for it this spring or summer...because somewhere today, someone is lying in a bed with failing health saying a sincere prayer to be well...and you are healthy...so get up and use it.  I mean that sincerely, Buckers. :-)

Being Present in the Run

     There could be several titles for today's blog.  I contemplated "The Energy," "The Spirit of the Run," "Running Spirits," etc, so before it just got weird, I satisfyingly typed the title at the top and felt it fit like the last piece in a thousand word puzzle.  "Being Present in the Run."  Yes, I purposefully used "in" instead of "on" because that is the meat of this brain snack today, the "in." Even if you do not consider yourself a runner, the concept of being present in any situation has the same benefits.
     Running, whether a short one or long one, is most often a positive, almost spiritual experience for me.  I say most often, because I'll be the first to admit, and runners will agree, there are once in a while, runs that feel like the running spirit has been sent on a route leading straight to hell.  Runs like that mentally feel longer than they should, and the body just isn't in the mood. Yet, I want to concentrate on the positive energy, so I'll save the "Even Satan Hates Me" for another day.
     It is the "in" that I intentionally make myself aware and present while swimming, biking, running...or driving..or sitting in the evening..or (you get my drift) that I want to discuss.  It is within this "in" I am present and aware of everything, and I become grateful to be doing what I am doing.
     On my last run, I had enough miles I had to complete that I was able to truly be present and aware of the colors of winter in Illinois.  I love the Midwest because I am treated by Nature to all four seasons. Over the passing of a year of running, one of my same routes changes in colors as well as landscape.  Take for instance, in January, the same dull and chalky asphalt country road that stretches for miles separating dark brown plowed fields on each side, changes drastically. In the heat of July, the very same asphalt road becomes shiny and jet black because of the hot summer sun melting the asphalt into tiny bubbles.  The road still stretches for miles, but in July becomes encased no longer by plowed fields, but six foot thick walls of deep green corn.  I have a friend that refuses to run on country roads in the summer due to feeling boxed in, but I just picture an Ironman finish lined with people waving their arms and cheering.
     It's not easy to stay "in" the run or workout because thoughts often drift to time outside of the run. Our busy lives and the lists for tomorrow or what happened yesterday are too often the focus.  It's time to take charge of the things that come to mind while training and guide them to the present. You can start out by choosing one of the five senses, and as you progress, you'll be able to take in more.
      First, be aware of your surroundings.  (you can even do this now where you are sitting) What colors do you see?  How many different colors do you see?  What shades of the same color do you notice?  Did your breathing slow?
     It takes practice but it works.  When you have the colors down, move on to the smells.  Recognizing this can be done in the country or the city when you are training.  Relax your shoulders. Again, be aware of how you're breathing.  If running...mile two just drifted into four ......

Enjoy the present, Buckers.

The Dreadmill

     With all of the rain, it's been difficult to run outside, so again, I've been stuck on the treadmill for several runs.  I've made peace with the treadmill but have definitely created a mental list of pros and cons while putting in the many miles, as well as discovered the history of the treadmill.

     Before I mention the pros and cons, you may find it interesting that according to Treadmill Reviews,
                 "treadmills were invented in order to try to reform prisoners, a practice
                  that was established all the way back in 1817 by Sir William Cubitt. The
                  invention of the treadmill for the purpose of use in prisons can be traced
                  to an economic need. In England in the 19th century, many laborers found
                  themselves out of a job after the Napoleonic Wars, and the country could
                  not afford to allow convicts to take jobs away from English laborers. As a
                  solution, Cubitt came up with institutional treadmills whose purpose it was
                  to offer power to mills. The prisoners were forced to hang on to the bar and
                  climb up the paddle blades, which made them constantly lift up their legs."

     I'm not sure if a treadmill will ever help reform me in any way, but I'm quite sure it feels like a prison sentence when I have a fourteen miler even with the TV on the front.  That leads me to my list of pros of running on the treadmill.

Pros:
     I can watch HGTV.  (Home and Garden Television)  I make a list in my head of things I can purchase at Menards to redo my entire house...myself, because after all, I've watched how it's done.

     Even though it's icy and or raining outside, I can still get a run completed.

     I save money shopping because by the time the run is over, I've realized I won't be going to Menards to get the materials because that would take time away from my running.

    All water, Gatorade, GU gels, tissues, cheater glasses..yes, I need those, BASE salt, and phone are in their places on the front of the treadmill...and the bathroom is private.

Cons:
     I don't get to revel in  the beauty of nature and the energy in everything as I run outside. (watch I AM documentary.  Beautiful.)

     Running is not the same with the belt moving under me vs me creating the movement on the road or trail.
   
     I have to actually get off the treadmill, walk to the bathroom, wash my hands after, etc. if I have to pee.  On the road (I'm out in the country lol  I can watch for a car and if no one is coming, pop a squat if needed.  Yes, yes, I do .  Right on the side of the road.  No one is watching...live a little people...

     I can't spit or fart on the treadmill at the gym.  Nature outside is OK with my habits.  You don't fart or spit when you run?....not even a really long run?  Are you running fast enough?  Getting the right foods? :-)  If you aren't OK with farting, well, our running friendship will be short. :-)

     Running outside allows me to not get pissed due to some moron running out of the woods, then all of a sudden RIGHT next to me.  This happens on a treadmill, and I get SO pissed when  a person gets on the one RIGHT next to me when there is a line of empty treadmills.  (I always get on the end one next to the wall. It's mine.  All mine.  No exceptions.)

I could go on  and on about the cons of running on a treadmill but I will say, I am grateful for the option.  

Stay safe running or walking on the road or treadmill this week, Buckers.

 

"The Treadmill: A History." The Treadmill: A History 2017 | TreadmillReviews.net. Treadmill Reviews,      
     2017. Web. 19 Jan. 2017.